Real change is not something you do until you lose that extra 15 pounds. Change is not deciding to take one night class to improve your education. Change is not being nice and giving your spouse attention until you get past the rough spot in your relationship.
I don't know how many people I have worked with that lost the 15 pounds, the 25 pounds even the 105 pounds and then gained it back and more. They all had "I will do this until" thinking. When they came to me they still had "I will do this until thinking."
I have asked people that are struggling in their career if they had ever done anything before that helped and several said, "Yes, I went back to school, or I took some extra classes, I read this book, I had a mentor..."
So that helped, "oh yes!" Then why did you stop?
I have worked with people that had their relationship on the rocks. I asked them, have you ever had trouble before and it got better? Almost always the answer is "Yes, there was a time we hit a rough patch and we worked our way through it."
So why did you stop working?
Real change is a lifestyle. Real change isn't just a six week program or one class you take or bringing home flowers once or reading one book to improve your life in a year. We call all of those things a start.
You must start, but a start isn't a finish.
You must create a lifestyle that supports the changes in your life you desire. You have to realize and accept the reward is worth some constant effort, worth changing how you live and look at things permanently.
Your goal can't be when I accomplish this, weight loss, relationship goal, this career change, get out of this financial problem that I can reward myself by going back to living the way that got me into this problem.
You have to realize the way you were living is the problem. You can't separate cause from effect.
The good news is this, small, simple, permanent changes will over time make a dramatically different life. To lose 15 pounds in six weeks it takes some pretty big changes, but to lose 15 pounds in six months isn't hard and those changes are changes that you can live with the rest of your life.
More good news is that changes become habits and changes become normal in time. What is an effort now will be second nature in 60 days if you consistently do it every day.
Don't suffer all your life with "I will do this until ____" thinking.
Look at what you want in life, then start making small permanent changes to create a lifestyle that will bring you the life you desire and keep it there to stay.
Scott Hogue CChH